A Post About Rape

Last night as we were settling into bed, M asked me what "stalking" was.  I looked over to find her perusing a brochure about sexual harassment that had been printed by an office of the college she attends.  After explaining what stalking is, I asked her where she had gotten this document.

M:  Oh, some people were handing them out and asked me some questions like, am I a victim of rape?
 E: Well, that's kind of odd, what did you say?
M: That I'm raped every night by someone strong and powerful. (purrs a little)
E: And did they take you seriously?
M: Oh yes, and I told them it was my husband, and that if he didn't rape me I would rape him!

After explaining to her that such people standing at booths handing out such materials were usually liberal (read: humorless and close-minded) about these things, we got into a discussion about rape.  The gist that I got out of our conversation was as follows: 

If a girl is 'with' a man, such as on a date or otherwise in a setting on a more personal basis, it is expected that, if he should take initiative, sex can happen.  A girl may try to resist, but if she does and fails to resist him, it is largely her fault for putting herself into such proximity and relation to that man.  She then has a choice to continue associating with him, or perhaps to seek a third party if she has a serious beef against the guy.  This third party is usually a family member (father, uncle, etc).  Essentially, being "raped" like this is your own fault and everybody knows it.

Now, if you're wondering how this applies to you, I can assure you that you should not try to have your way with any girl you might happen to date in Ukraine or Russia, if for no other reason that that Dad / Uncle are pretty scary dudes!  What I can say is that inside the context of our marriage, I don't have to worry that being forward with adult activities will be interpreted as an assault.  What a relief that I don't have to worry about what so many of my countrymen have to!

Furthermore, a quotable quote from M that I got last night in the same vein as Boris and Natasha: 

"When I was [very young], I wasn't wanting to [have intimate relations] with a boy who had pimples on his face, I wanted someone almost 30, someone who had hair on his..." 

You can guess.